In support of Baby Loss Awareness Week 2024, Davies and Partners’ Associate Solicitor Tina Ashley is participating in the SANDS Starlight Walk on 23 November 2024 at the Ashton Court Estate, Bristol.
The walk is to recognise those affected by the loss of a baby and help them find their light in the dark.
The charity SANDS reports that every day 13 babies die before, during, or shortly after birth. They are a national organisation that works towards not only reducing the number of baby deaths, but also ensuring that anyone impacted
by the death of a baby receives the care and support they need to navigate through their trauma.
Their website is www.sands.org.uk, where you’ll find links to a free helpline, online community, and support networks that exist across the country. They organise charity events nationwide, and the Starlight Walk is just one of many you can participate in to support them.
Tina’s story
I’m a Senior Associate in the medical negligence team at Davies and Partners.
In March 2019, when I was 38, I fell pregnant. I experienced all the usual mixed emotions, worrying about affordability and whether I’d make a good parent. However, I quickly formed a bond with my unborn baby, and was excited about the prospect of parenthood.
On 3 June 2019, when I was 13 weeks pregnant, I experienced a dull ache on my left side. I called 111 and was referred to the EPU after an out-of-hours GP appointment. A scan revealed that I’d suffered a missed miscarriage; the baby had died at 8 weeks, and my body had not recognised this. Six days later, I had a D&C.
I found myself approaching my 40th birthday and so embarked on a fertility journey, giving birth to a beautiful baby daughter in August 2022.
I didn’t know that one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage, and had been struggling with not just the taboo that exists around talking about miscarriage, but also the insensitive comments from others that a miscarriage seems to invite. Despite having a great family support network, I felt lonely until I found the Miscarriage Association and the Instagram page the_worstgirlgang_ever.
I’m so grateful to the Miscarriage Association and the women who’ve shared their stories through the worst girl gang ever. I now understand the effect of the miscarriage on my mental health, but it took years to come to terms with, and affected every aspect of my life. At the time I felt a real lack of compassion and emotional support from medical staff but I’m pleased to know that the NHS is making improvements.
I’m so fortunate to have my rainbow baby and hope that by sharing this story, I can help others who are not so far along their pathway through grief. I’d like to support at least one couple during their dark times, especially now I feel strong enough now to talk about my own journey. This is why I’m taking part in the SANDS Starlight Walk.
Resources
• The miscarriage association: www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk or calling their helpline on 01924 200 799.
• SANDS www.sands.org.uk
• Tommy’s www.tommys.org
• Aching Arms a charity which provides help and support through baby loss. www.achingarms.co.uk
• The lullaby Trust www.lullabytrust.org.uk
• Ickle Pickles this year is joining together with Sand’s to commemorate all babies. www.icklepickles.org
If you would like to donate, please link to Tina’s fundraising page here: